I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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