i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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