I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
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