with your own penis?
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
