Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Why is your signature on my underwear?
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
