So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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