I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
