And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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