once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
