if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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