jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
