Small penises have feelings too.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
