Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
