well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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