Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize