I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I'm too high and old for this...
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
