3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
