your parents love me but you hate me
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
