I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
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