the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
