No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
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