dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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