I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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