I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
