who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
