I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Randomize
