I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
