New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Houston, we have a blender
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
