remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
