I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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