u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
