i would punch a child for taco bell
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
