i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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