You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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