Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize