If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
