people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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