A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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