it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
