"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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