Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize
