How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
