is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
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