Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
