And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
