Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
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