I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
