four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
