Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize