Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
