I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
