from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I got inside last night via doggy door
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
