fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
