Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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