some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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