small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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