Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize